Skip to main content

Why Must We Be Friends?





Hello dear passerby. Thank you for coming to my blog page to read the workings of my mind. I didn't post last week because I had not one single idea on what to write about, here are a few random things that crossed my mind to write on:
'How to kill your neighbours pet'  I hurriedly decided against this because I knew it was hugely influenced by my binge watching of criminal minds and the fact that I have a tricky relationship with animals.
'How to catch a serial killer', lmao! this was also a criminal minds induced hallucination, now I kind of think of myself as a profiler ( I wish).
'How to train your child' this is so funny because I have absolutely no idea and I know this is not where you should come for this kind of advice.
 How not to spend your first million (I will actually write on this soon) and many other seriously laughable topics were involved but I finally got to write about how we can't all possibly be friends, it's impossible if we barely like each other. Here is  why;
Rita is dating Fred and they have been together for about 3 years. Rita has her friends and so does Fred now all Fred's bros have girl friends and the boys kind of expect that because they are tight like bros then all their babes will be sisters. 
Men you have to stop it. Stop it right now. This is usually also most expected from wives. Stop it, because two have become one does not mean that you have automatically obliterated your partners personality. Making friends for women is twice as hard because this is different how it goes down for girls and boys; girl meets boy they both like each other's personalities or have what to talk about, no prancing or comparison so they become friends before you know it you hear the girl talking about a new boy she met who is her bff.

Now on the other hand, a girl meets another girl, unless it's for work or its your sisters friends it is very unlikely that she will just come out of her shell for the other girl. They sit and use side eye to evaluate each other. Why does she laugh so loud? What's up with  her poking her cleavage in my husband's face? Why is she holding her boyfriend like that? Does she think I want to steal him? Why is she trying so hard with that her fake purse? and other self-serving dark thoughts. It is three times harder when there is already a pre-existing girl clique and a new girl shows up and woe betide the poor girl or woman if they already knew her gist and were talking about her before, for instance, is that his wife? Thank God the kids took after their father, na wa o, opposites really attract? of course they are exceptions to this rule where girls meet new girls hit it off and turn to die hard best friends but these are few. It usually takes months and most times years of attitude and real beef for women to be real friends.

There are people we call our friends but who are really there so that they can feel better about themselves and you use them for the exact same purpose. Some are there to leech off you and others for you to leech off of. So now we are not going to be holding hands with your best friends girlfriends and sing kumbaya just because you think we should hit it off with her maybe because you hit it off with her and therefore we should too. Sometimes you don't like your friends wife's or girlfriends so what makes you think that we should like them. Sigh.

That being said I love everyone, I love all my friends' friends and they love me lmao! No they don't, I am not someone who necessity inspires love in people at first. To love me is to know me and once you do, you will forever. I am a friend catcher(that's my story and I am sticking to it. 

So guys, Just give us time, don't say things like "babe I think you should go to my friend Ayo's house and learn how to make so and so food from his wife" in front of said wife unless it is your intention to die from food poisoning or something more severe, like a knife to your jugular. 

Friendship is earned let's all stop expecting magic and my number one tip for making and keeping good friends is trying to be a good one yourself. If you don't put yourself out for others no one will be inclined  to do the same for you. So that is why we aren't all meant to be friends because it means much more than sharing drinks and laughing in good times. 


XO

Comments

  1. Nice post Koyona...got me laughing @ 'don't say things like "babe I think you should go to my friend Ayo's house and learn how to make so and so food from his wife" in front of said wife unless it is your intention to die from food poisoning or something more severe'.....www.deevasoles.blogspot.com.ng

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Killing of the Virtuous Woman

(Unchained Part 1) This is where she died. The virtuous woman. She started early with one kid on her back and the other one pinned to her side. Going up a hill with a bucket of water while he still slept... Back pain killed her. No appetite after cooking food for you and you and you, too tired to laugh or eat or take part in the conversation… Complacency killed her They said to make something of yourself. She had no time; home had to be perfect she said my home is the reflection of who I am… Aimlessness killed her. She began late with the clothes washing and the floor scrubbing while watching the brood she had to split to bare. Because of love, she held nothing back... She moved on to the bedroom where she had to be your love, your whore, your dream for 5 minutes and yet you found flaws, but she smiled and moved on with it… Selflessness killed her. This is where she died the love of your life, of heartbreak when she heard you had room in your heart f...

Lets Talk About Love

                            My  'let's talk about sex ' post is one of the most popular on the blog. It's lovely to see how so many people share such a similar opinion when it comes to sex. Before you go ahead to read this, I am aware that there are different kinds of love, like that of a parent and the child, or best friends or siblings. That kind of love we have for God or Family is not the kind that I am discussing here. Here I am looking at the possible distortion of the erotic kind of love, the kind that's usually found in relationships of the opposite sex,  what is called Eros.  Now let's see about that Love. What is love anyway? Millions of movies, songs, books and poems have been written to express love yet humanity is still in awe of this big emotion. Love the word was probably invented when man found a way to communicate with language, before that I bet they were cues peo...

The Nigerian Dream

                                                   If you are an avid oyibo movie watcher like me, then you have heard of what they call, the American Dream. It means the idea that anyone in the United States has the chance to achieve success and prosperity.  I figure the dream runs along different lines for different folks, for some it might be being a successful father, mildly busy but extremely available mother, two children, a dog  (or some other animal)and a great white house with a fence of some sort (this is just the way I assume it will look) or it could be building and running your own fortune 500 company from starting in a garage or your bedroom. This dream is supported by a system that makes education up to high school level free and compulsory and provides opportunities to be held on to and grow. This dream is achieved by some an...